More Memories

This was my grandparents' house. The house has been in the family for a long time because it used to be owned by my grandmother's aunt before my grandparents owned it.  Now my uncle and aunt own it and live in it. We went there for a BBQ last night and it was the first time I'd seen it since they remodeled and moved in. A lot of memories came flooding back to me.

This is the living room which my uncle and aunt have kept pretty much the same. Some of the furniture belonged to my grandparents' and is still in the same place it used to be. I have many memories of my grandma playing piano in this room and sitting by the fire. She loved her fireplace.

One Christmas we gave my Grandpa a dancing, singing Santa and every time someone turned it on Grandpa would dance along with it, swinging his hips from right to left. This room reminds me of that.

Here is the kitchen. My aunt and uncle remodeled it before they moved in. It used to be tiny with barely enough room for two people to stand in comfortably. I used to hang out there with Grandma while she prepared meals. I remember talking and talking with her in this room. It looks so different now, it's barely recognizable. I think my aunt and uncle did a nice job with it though. I like the way they opened up the space and added the bar.

My grandmother loved this sun room. One summer she turned it into a bedroom for me and my friend who I'd brought with me from California. Grandma put two small beds in here and curtains over the windows so we'd have privacy. We'd stay up late into the night talking and giggling about boys. Grandpa would get up several times a night and bang on the door to let us know that it was time to quiet down and get to sleep. That was a fantastic summer.

This is the beautiful backyard. I remember doing many cartwheels here. I'm surprised there aren't watermelons growing back there because we spit many a watermelon seed in the grass each summer. I also remember seeing fireflies in this backyard on summer evenings. It was always a nice place but it's even nicer now because my aunt has an amazing green thumb.

On another note, today my mother, my aunt, and I went through all of Grandma's jewelry. No one had looked through it since she passed away three years ago. There was a lot of it. Some costume, some valuable, and some very sentimental. My aunt found a white envelope and handed it to me. On it, in my grandma's neat cursive, it said "from Juliette". 

I opened it and inside was a beaded necklace I had made for her when I was probably about 10 years old. Seeing the necklace brought back strong emotions for me. I tried to hold back tears but I couldn't. 

I was fine after just a few moments but the whole experience was a little overwhelming. Some of the jewelry was so familiar to me. I had seen Grandma wear it a hundred times. I pulled out one silver chain that I know my grandma used to wear all the time and I swear I could still smell her sweet scent lingering on it. 

This trip has just been full of so many memories...

Canada

I'm in Canada right now visiting my mom's side of the family. Elgin County, Ontario, Canada is a really familiar place for me. I spent every summer here as a child. We would usually stay at my grandparents' house or at my aunt's cottage by Lake Erie. I would swim, play with cousins and friends, go to camp, eat ice cream, play games, and lots of other summer activities. I grew up thinking this was the best place in the entire world. As a kid, when I imagined my perfect place it was here, with my grandma and grandpa.

I haven't been here for three years.

My grandfather passed away in 2001 and then in 2009 my grandma also passed away. I brought my infant son here to meet her twice before she passed and then I brought him again in July of 2009 for her memorial service. I had every intention of continuing to come at least once a year but, for one reason or another, it hasn't worked out that way.

After three years of being away, in some ways, it feels like no time has passed at all. Many things are exactly as they always have been. At the same time it feels different here.

As we were sitting waiting to board our plane at LAX last night I suddenly had a realization that my grandma wasn't waiting for us to arrive. It was a heavy moment for me as I let that realization hit me and sink in. I remembered how she would always greet us at her front door with an excited hug and a sing-songy "hellooo". It brings pangs of sadness to me now, as I write this, that I will never hear that hello again.

Tonight we went to get ice cream at Shaw's, a popular ice cream shop. I'm not exactly sure how long it's been around but I know it's been there a long time. At least long enough that my mom and her siblings went there as children. I asked my aunt how long the building has looked the way it does now and she said that it has as long as she can remember. I reminisced about going there many times as a child and choosing bubble gum ice cream. I would lick the ice cream and store the chunks of bubble gum inside one cheek. Then, when all the ice cream and cone was gone, I would chew that stored up gum all the way home to my grandma's house. As I think about it now I can taste the sugary sweetness in my mouth and it turns my stomach. What a disgusting ice cream flavor! Tonight I went with the oh-so-much-more-sophisticated "Smores" flavor. I enjoyed it. But mostly I enjoyed watching my son lick away at his strawberry cone. I think it may have been the first ice cream cone he's ever had and he barely got a drop on him. His neatness in eating it reminded me that he is growing up so fast.

I'm happy to be here with my two children. I'm looking forward to sharing many of my summer memories with them and to making new memories with them too.